P. G. Wodehouse
'Don't blame me, Pongo,' said Lord Ickenham, 'if Lady Constance takes
her lorgnette to you. God bless my soul, though, you can't compare
the lorgnettes of today with the ones I used to know as a boy. I
remember walking one day on Grosvnor Square with my aunt Brenda and
her pug dog Jabberwocky, and a policeman came up and said the latter
ought to be wearing a muzzle. My aunt made no verbal reply. She
merely whipped her lorgnette from its holder and looked at the man,
who gave one choking gasp and fell back against the railings, starting
eyes as if he had seen some dread- ful sight. A doctor was sent for,
and they managed to bring him round, but he was never the same again.
He had to leave the Force, and eventually drifted into the grocery
business. And that is how Sir Thomas Lipton got his start.
Uncle Fred in the Springtime, 1939
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